In 2006, I went to GenCon 2006 which I think to this day is the biggest tournament I been to playing Yugioh, where I was playing my old Horus deck, it was fun because in hindsight, I lived and saw a lot of legendary things. I held a UDE Seal of Orichalcos, I played against Cyber-Stein format, met a lot of overseas players from Brazil. This was the end of my most competitive year of Yugioh where in one year I went to no less then 4 regionals, 1 Shonen Jump and a point based summer long tournament. What made it worse was I found out that I missed out on the chance of winning a legendary card at the time because I left GenCon early (lost my phone the week before so no one could call me), it was the SJC Shrink and after coming back I really felt defeated. Plus I had a lot of personal baggage that I had to sort out after coming back, all I will say on that is that there is somethings you cannot force with people.
In 2008 and 2009, this was my second most competitive time for me, I didn't go to many regionals but I went to enough in the timeline to try and go to nationals. This was the era of the infamous Dark Armed Dragon and later what would be called Tele-DAD, in which I really question myself because I was hit with what we called the "$5000 Combo", which was Gold Sarcophagus into Crush Card Virus. Why was it a "$5000 Combo"? Because when I was first hit with that combo those 2 cards were championship level cards, meaning you were only able to get the cards if you won a Shonen Jump Championship, which was a combo that would let you search 1 card and add it to your hand in 2 turns, so you would add Crush Card Virus which would almost always destroy most of your hand and for 3 turns if you drew a monster with a particular amount of attack you would have to discard them, effectively deadlocking your draws. This was first and ONLY time, where I truly hated playing Yugioh as a card game. Needless to say, I think everyone anyone who went through that, would give up competitive play, and I did.
Now in 2018, here I am once again, questioning myself about my skill level. I know what the problem is, in a tournament moment I get a stressed because I am trying to play very carefully, and then I forget a important play, and when I am on my game I am trying to move as fast as I can because the new time rules can make or break your wins, which happened tonight, I lost because the new time rule locked me out of the win, one more turn and I would have won. I am in that point where, I am reevaluating myself in the context of this game, the deck I am playing, and my personality.
I felt like talking about myself and how I feel, I wanted to get a lot of that off my heart and just talk in detail, about something that is dear to my heart and kinda where I came from in card games. Because I think it does influence personality, can put you in a place where you might not realize that was a part of yourself, and don't want to feel but you have to let wash over you, because feelings are a part of you and define your dreams. I guess that is all I have to say.
"Believe in yourself and you shall always prevail"
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